Funniest Thing You Have Been Told By A Dealer...

[FinlayJ]

When I went to sign for my R27 F1, the salesman said he will be putting some fuel in the car for me. Great I said, obviously you will be putting superplus in but can I ask that you put Shell V Power in? He looked at me with a blank look and said...............You have lost me, Whats superplus & V Power?? lol

 

[Harpham]

I went to look at a 200 today..

''I've got a 182 trophy at the moment''

-'Oh yeah, we had a blue trophy in last month'

Only a minor thing, but the cluelesness continued...

Must be mega rare

 

[Gouldy]

i have sat most of the evening and read through the entire 45 pages of this thread and good lord have i LOLd!!!!!!

best thread ever IMO

 

[Addz]

It's good but slightly worrying at the same time really!

 

[GiT]

My old man was looking for a car - oooo 15 odd years ago. At a dealership in Grimsby and we were looking about... He was after a diesel.

The "Salesman" pointed out a Volvo 480. We walked over and I asked... "Why are you showing him this - he's after a diesel"

To which the reply was "It is a diesel - it says Turbo on the back..."

"That'll be a PETROL 1.7 TURBO then matey..."

Salesman replies "No - I know my cars, it's 100% a Diesel"

Once we'd flicked the bonnet to teach him a thing or 2, pointed out the IGNITION LEADS and got him to realise how stupid he'd made himself look, we left vowing to never go there again.

We never lol. Seriously... I really hope this doesn't carry on these days and that this "Salesman" is packing chickens in a factory somewhere. (He didn't deserve the job he had clearly).

 

[mitch1503]

test driving my 172 cup the salesman started going on about how it had ABS,ESP and traction control at which point i turned round and sed really i thought this car is the cup at which hes replied it is sir so i just had 2 point out how theyd removed all thast and the leather seats 2 help save weight...
only thing he was correct about was it has the A/C

dont deserve the job most of them

 

[ilovewilly]

A ferrari 360 is cheaper to run than a V6 clio (in terms of parts), no arguement - fact!

genuine brembo discs are cira £125 each, pads are approx £90 (same front and rear pads), cabelt changes are easy etc etc

Over £2000 for a 360 cambelt change at 'rari!

How much for a set of Clio V6 centre caps? Ferrari wanted over £100 for 4. Were cheaper in Tampa Bay.

 

[G3 NYX]

My door mirror fell off, but it was still hanging on loose so I pulled into Tonbridge Renault and asked if a mechanic could see if he could pop it back on.

Mechanic: Oh its broken just stick some duct tape on it

Me: Can I buy a new one?

Mechanic: I don't know...

Couple of days later my gf's dad looked at it and popped it straight back on :/

 

[MartinR]

being told by renault uk that my 182 does not need the auxcillary kit changing every 36000miles. it is 72000miles i then told her thats the timing belt she then said they don't have timing belts they have cam belts after pissing myself laughing down the phone at her she then told me that the cam belt kit and aux kit had been changed. so i said why is the tensioner discoloured , shabby and looks a bit old she then told me thats what they look like. at this point she is really high rate and being a bit sharp on the phone so i put it down. and phoned back and dealt with someone else

francis at renault uk is a useless old bat :rasp:

 

[jezcharger]

On the phone to performance car "specialist" insurers Swinton:

Hi I would like to get a quote for my Mitsubishi Evo 8:

Is that a Diesel?

Click

 

[jack_kemp]

When looking for my 182, i was told that the cup packs had no affect on the resale value, and that i was wasting my time looking for a Racing Blue 182, i should simply buy there 04 plate 182 with no cup packs for £8495

£8495!!!!! What?!
You can buy a good 197 for that money.....

 

[todd100]

only thing a dealers good for is a skoda fabia splitter

 

[Addicted]

"it was driven by a woman" - does that make it any better, really?

 

[OLR]

Was told recently by a cheeky dealer when I was dropping my mum off to pick up her Corsa 1.3 D, her Diesel will be faster than my loud boy racer car.

I replied "Ye, I was quite amazed when I heard that Vauxhall managed to get 170bhp out of a 1.3d"

Dealer "I know, it even won awards for fuel economy as well, quite an amazing engine"

I really almost died when he said that.

 

[MartinR]

Was told recently by a cheeky dealer when I was dropping my mum off to pick up her Corsa 1.3 D, her Diesel will be faster than my loud boy racer car.

I replied "Ye, I was quite amazed when I heard that Vauxhall managed to get 170bhp out of a 1.3d"

Dealer "I know, it even won awards for fuel economy as well, quite an amazing engine"

I really almost died when he said that.

^^^^^^lol how do these people get jobs

 

[Fred@BTM]

Over £2000 for a 360 cambelt change at 'rari!

How much for a set of Clio V6 centre caps? Ferrari wanted over £100 for 4. Were cheaper in Tampa Bay.

£35 each from memory!!! cambelt kit isn't that much, i've done them in 4hours before (ferrari say the engine has to come out, b****cks!)

 

[ilovewilly]

£35 each from memory!!! cambelt kit isn't that much, i've done them in 4hours before (ferrari say the engine has to come out, b****cks!)

It was done at Dick Lovett's in Cardiff.

Do you know of any fixes for a leaking roof? 2002 Spider F1

Has been back for a fix but window was broken in process and rain flies in on the motorway.

 

[Kat@Renparts]

A customer has just asked me how her engine is a 1.2 8v when renault told her they didn't fit any 1.2 8v engines to the ph2 clio. How some people are so clueless is beyond me!! Also another customer asked me if I was sure it was a throttle body he needed, as the garage fitting it had never heard of a throttle body!

 

[Eddie.]

When me and Jon went to look at a RB full fat at a second hand place, the guy told us the cup model was worth more because it had a cup exhaust, when we explained that a. There is no such thing as a cup exhaust, and b. It wasnt a cup, he tried to say there is no way to tell the differance between a cup and a non cup, and not even RUK could tell... never seen Jon get so angry! He also went on to 'bet' us £1000 that we couldn't prove it wasn't a cup... was hilarious looking back!

 

[welshname]

When me and Jon went to look at a RB full fat at a second hand place, the guy told us the cup model was worth more because it had a cup exhaust, when we explained that a. There is no such thing as a cup exhaust, and b. It wasnt a cup, he tried to say there is no way to tell the differance between a cup and a non cup, and not even RUK could tell... never seen Jon get so angry! He also went on to 'bet' us £1000 that we couldn't prove it wasn't a cup... was hilarious looking back!

Jon got angry. I didn't think he was capable of that.

 

[BurnyC]

When I was test driving a 182 before I bought the one I've got, at a Renault dealer, the bloke told me the squealing noise that happened when I put the AC on and put my foot down was 'a characteristic of these engines, and perfectly normal'. To be fair it probably is a characteristic of most 182 engines, given peoples ignorance of the belts...

 

[is1]

Oak Tree Mitsubishi, "Ralliart" approved franchise. A couple of years back, I took my EVO VI there to get the head unit changed for an iPod compatible one amongst other (recall) work.
The "technician" told me that the existing head unit needed the keys that slide down the side to remove it and therefore couldn't do that part of the job. He would note the model of the head unit and call me back.
Some three weeks later, no call back. Anyway, I go to renowned EVO independents, Xtreme Automobiles in Stourbridge for a part/look around. I spoke to one of the techs there who said "you're having a laugh". You just remove the trim around the head unit and there is a screw either side of the head unit and out it comes.
He does it in front of me, in literally 2 minutes and fits the head unit that was in the boot in about 10 minutes max.
I stopped using Oak Tree after that.

 

[Eddie.]

Jon got angry. I didn't think he was capable of that.

You're telling me! He ended up storming off! Don't blame him, the guy was a dick!

 

[skiptontweed]

Going back a few years when I was buying a 172 Cup from Fords of Winsford, aka Frauds-of-Winsford.
Out on the test drive the salesman said something about ABS/ESP and how safe these cars are......so I locked all four wheels at 50.
I think he actually shat himself and went very quiet after that.

 

[Caekii]

Not a Renault dealer but one of my many many experiences with Perry's (this was a fault a few weeks after Perry's had to rebuild the engine under warrenty coz the piston rings and numerous other bits were f*cked)

D: One of our technicians has taken your car for a drive and we're 100% certain that the grinding is only there in 5th and 6th gear.
M: I told you the grinding was only there in 5th & 6th gear. I want to know whats causing it
D: Oh, yes, well its caused by the tracking being out and uneven tyre wear is causing it to grind like that.
M: So wouldnt I hear that noise through the gear range when the car is moving and the tone would change?
D: Yes.
M: But I dont, its only in 5th and 6th gear. A friend of mine said it might be a bearing in the gearbox.
D: Highly unlikely, we've never had a gearbox failure on one of these.

At this point some mechanic walked in from their workshop

DM: "See Andy, I told you that Turbo would be back, I bet he's complaining about the gearbox, told you we shouldve replaced it when it dropped off the tranmission jack"
Me: *Raised eyebrow look at the Service Manager* "hmmm"
D: He's joking...
DM: "Ooooooooo..." beats a hasty exit out of Service reception"
D: So shall we take it for another drive to make sure it is the tyres causing this or shall we just fit you some tyres as we think that should cure it, the tyres are £xxx
M: Here's £20, fix it for that otherwise I'll be back again with trading standards.
D: Does it have fuel in it?
M: Take £10 out of that £20, if you cant fix it for that, get another £10 fuel and set fire to the f***in thing, I dont want it back.

Fast forward to 6 months later:

M: *gets rid of the Astra and buys the 182.*

Happy ending or what?

 

[Fred@BTM]

m : can i have 2 new front springs for a trophy please
d : they'll be there in a week

i ring and complain, the next set are just as bad

after a few phone calls to France etc, that's how "NEW" Trophy springs come (all ready made when the cars were new)

 

[Vicky.]

Having pretty much the identical issue as Fred just with 197 wheels.

I need one new satin black speedline and when I went to collect it had a big scratch in it. Another came and there was a chip in the back , obviously meaning that it'll corrode sooner surely?

Anyway supposed to collect one this morning and they've just called to say it's scratched and they won't be able to get a perfect one as that how they come from Renault and I'll have to take it up with Customer Services.

Retards.

 

[Fred@BTM]

I got that too, "take it up with customer services" no, YOU THE DEALER take it up with them, now f**k off

 

[mdking]

I had the regional Sale manager for Renault try and tell me i do not have to declare to my insurers any modified parts on my 197......

(Long story)

:nono:

 

[jenic]

Guy at renault told me last year (when I was 20) that i'll never be able to afford to insure an RS clio or megane, despite turning up in my 182 :S

Idiot.

 

[JackJack]

Lol at not being able to supply undamaged wheels.

 

[Polls]

Was in a renault dealership in north Devon ordering up a rear wheel bearing when the sales man asked me what a bearing was.....really instills an idea of knowledge and understanding doesn't it?

 

[Jamie16v]

Got told to fix the plunger behind my brake pedal they have to remove the dash, wheel, centre console and possibly the drivers seat.

Later that day I done it in 5 minutes...

 

[DB.]

Guy at renault told me last year (when I was 20) that i'll never be able to afford to insure an RS clio or megane, despite turning up in my 182 :S

Idiot.

Lol

A renault dealer in Nottingham laughed me out the showroom asking to test drive a 182, saying you couldn't afford the insurance, and they have had a few students from the halls up the road try it before.

They also said there are only 200 Renault Megane 225s in the country, they obviously meant R26s.

I went in a fortnight later and bought some Renaultsport mats from my Clio 182, making sure the person who said that saw me in it.

 

[Alexlfc]

When shopping for a fiesta st for my gf she was told there would be no way she would get insurance on it and should go for something with a smaller engine. She works at an insurance company so said its no problem, then he goes on about how it would still be really high compared to a smaller engined car (common sense but it was around £100 in it) Then tried claiming that the steering wheel was 'special edition' as it had the different coloured Ford badge which is just a gel overlay :nono: all this from a main Ford dealer as well. Made us feel really unwelcome and it seemed like he was trying to put us off the vehicle. Safe to say we didn't go ahead with it.

 

[TomBear]

me on phone to service after speaking to parts: hi ive just been speaking to parts about...........
them: ok ill put you through to parts


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ive just spoken to them!!!!!!!!!!!1

 

[Clarkey]

Erughh, I went in to get a RS Grill and he wanted my number plate, so I told him that my car is a non-sport and I want the sport grill on it so there is no use giving my number plate to him.

He looked at me like I was the stupid one.
Then he said it wouldn't fit.
After a little subtle argument with the guy, he then asks me what grill I'm talking about.

/facepalm.

I had to leave otherwise I was going to be late back from lunch-break, so the next day I just got a number plate from a 182 and gave it to him, saves all the hassle.

 

[das_mitchell_200_cup]

being told by the guy in parks dunfermline having turned up in a 182 that the clio engine was naturally assperaited (F7 spellcheck) duh!!!

turning up in the 200 for a touch up kit asking for glacier white and the guy repies i dont think it will be glacier white ur after as its only for the sport range whats ur registration plate [ idiot ]:nono:

picking up the touch up kit( in the 200) had a look at the 200 in the showroom and got a few prices from the lass and this old geezer(who works there comes over " have u checked the insurance on that first pal i think you should " what a plamff

all :hail: parks dunfermline

 

[Feirny]

I had a female customer today who Renault had tried to charge £20 for a bulb to fix the washer jets.

I fitted her the 10A fuse she needed, and sent her on her way within about 3minutes.

 

[Alastair.]

So much bullshit in here its comical, you know when someone is lying lol